Why? Why? Why?

I knew we were going to get to this point at some time. I’d began to prepare for it and I’d tried to set my mind to the right frequency; all so I'd have the patience to overcome it. I genuinely didn’t expect it to come as early as it did though; that at the age of two (and early into her twos at that), my little girl would have developed what I have come to call the why why why syndrome. Initially we thought it was cute, and we still chuckle at times when she asks for the first time, but it quickly becomes old. It is certainly one of the most mind numbing, brain aching things she does (up there with the old two hour bed time routine and the irritating TV shows). I’ve always said I want her to be curious, to want to learn and to seek out knowledge, but it doesn't half get draining.

I’m sure many, if not all, parents can relate with this. That outside of ‘mum’ (or sometimes ‘dad’), the most irksome thing to come out of a chatty toddler’s mouth is the constant use of the word ‘why.’ It comes in response to almost anything. Sit down and eat your tea: why? Help me put your toys away: why? Your sister needs to go to sleep: why? It’s not just that she asks almost every time we tell her something, but it's the sheer volume too. I’ll answer her baseless questions and she’ll come back with, you guessed it, ‘why?’ over and over until time feels like it's standing still. Usually, after four or five (but which feels more like 20!), I’ll manage to distract her with something else as my head gets ready to explode. This is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to repetition; but more on that later.

If it’s not ‘why?’, it’s ‘what you doing?’, ‘what happened?’ or ‘who’s that?’ whether she’s met the person 10 times or is just passing a stranger in the street (these, plus a cacophony of other queries!). They say the average child asks around 93 questions a day, and I swear my child is above that average (but I bet most parents will say that!). Then there’s the ‘can I haves?’, which could be in reference to anything from cake to paint and can be followed by a tantrum if I say no, which is mainly because she's already had one, it’s just before tea, or I simply can’t be bothered to clean up the mess. The most dreaded of questions, however, is ‘can you play with me?’ which she’ll typically ask when I’ve only just sat down after a day at work, when I need five minutes to finish off a piece of writing like this one, or when I’m getting our littlest girl to sleep. The game of the day will generally be the game that we play ALL day too. Whether it’s building blocks or colouring, singing and dancing or reading books; if we’re doing it in the morning, we will more than likely be doing it in the evening.

There has been no time worse than bedtime for the why why why syndrome to kick in. At this it would feel like an interrogation as she went through all 93+ questions before her head hit the pillow. This is when my brain had been known to be the densest and my nerves were the most frayed. It's been a little better recently, since my wife has been taking her to bed and has been diverting her attention with either her tablet or a book. For my sins, I look forward to her growing, to her going to school and having hundreds of more questions (that I hope I can answer); both about her work and the world around her. I look forward to her being able to see extended family and to get more answers from them (thus leaving me alone for a short period). Although what I most look forward to most is when our littlest girl is a couple of years older, and we have two of them at it!

By Calum Dewsbury